Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Oh, also:

I've uploaded more photos to Flickr, do drop by and check them out:

Super Awesome Radness!

And that my friends, is goodnight.

No, he doesn't understand...

Some things that make me smile a bit inside are when you hear people try to explain things to children.
The 'thing' in this instance was a surrealist piece which basically was an old iron with a row of nails sticking through the bottom of it.

A mother is explaining to her (I'm guesing) 6 year old what surrealism is. She used the words 'silly' and 'not real' alot.
The kid looked confused. Mum was eager to explain away this confusion, which surprisingly only served to further befuddle the child.

Nice work lady. Most six year olds brain's melt when they try to assemble their new lego space ship and here you are giving your 'sweet little Charles' a lesson in 1920's surrealism. Way to ruin your child's life.

And that's why rich women who think they're art buffs because they joined an advanced long-stitching class shouldn't have children.

Another valuable lesson from Jeremy.™

(Yes, I found the trademark symbol shortcut. I apologise now for its blatant overuse in future posts.)

Saturday, July 28, 2007

News from Jeremy

Not much unfortunately.
Finally been paid. Monthly pay is the root of all evil. Closely followed by carrots which many still believe are THE roots of evil. Bad vegetable joke there, sorry.
I've just finished up at a judging session for our Design Effectiveness Awards. Very interesting and enlightening experience. Met the CEO of Cobra Beer, the Nokia brand manager and Adidas' marketing director, or something.
Anyways, lots of important people with interesting views on design and other things. Meanwhile, Jeremy is off to the side with the mother of all colds, politely interrupting the proceedings with sneezes and coughs. Way to make an impression, loser.
Anyways, enough self depreciation.
Sitting in an internet cafe near Charlotte's work, waiting for her to finish ( I got an early mark- w00t!)
So, over the last couple of weeks, things that have happened include:

1) Pinner, Lisa and Aleisha have all found houses in the local area- Pinner and Lisa live a 5 minute walk from Cahrlotte and I, so have been catching up with them a bit.
Also went to Camden market with them on Saturday. Went to the Hawley Arms, which those of you well versed in the language of rock would know is a haunt of the White Stripes, Amy Winehouse (Who I hate)and other such luminaries. Probably. Exciting times...ish.

2) I was involved in my first event last week up in the glorious town of Leicester. Leicester is kind of like Shepparton. Enough said.
The event was good though. The guy who spoke branded the BBC and came second in the pitch for the London 2012 Olympics job, which has caused some major issues over here.
So was very interesting to gain some insight into such current matters.

3) I don't know why I write lists cos I can never think of any more than 2 points.

4) Ok, another point. (Phew) Might have picked up some weekend work trimming trees. Thanks to Cam Rae for providing me with years (ish) of experience. I think in England, if you have 4 teeth, can recite your name on command and don't soil yourself every time someone says 'hello', you're overqualified. For anything.

5)-Yes, I'm remembering more things now- Saw The Simpsons movie on Wednesday night. It was awesome. Especially Spider pig.

6) Just so you all know. In the supermarket, you can buy Polish foods. Unfortunately the name of this is emblazoned across the front. For some reason, instead of anglicising the names into something vaguely edible-sounding they've opted for Klopsy, Pulpety and Flaki. Seriously. And that's the story of why Polish Chef's get beaten up.
Is that not the most disgusting sounding food you've ever heard of. Pulpety. Klopsy. It sounds like biological field notes for animal refuse.

7) Which reminds me, bought tickets to go and see Bill Bailey at Wembley Stadium. Can't wait. But will have to as it's in November. I'm excited though.

Not much else to report on... Oh, half the country's under water. And people are being warned of Cholera and stuff. But that's out in the country bits, not London. But still, pretty bad from a supposed world-leader.

Also, I want to go to see Transformers but Charlotte won't come. Apparently it's not the sort of film that girls are into. How can girls not be impressed by a movie about giant transforming robots that are fighting over earth?
Weird.

Anyways, once I'm less ill and more into getting out and doing stuff, I shall write more rubbish for you.

Sincerely,

me.

Thursday, July 5, 2007

DEFCON 2, apparently.

Well, it would seem things here in London have been rather tense. What with all the car bombs, burning cars... Actually come to think of it, maybe this isn't a religious or political thing that's going on here. Perhaps there's another group out there. A heartless evil group of fundamentalist car haters. Being typically egocentric humans, we presume that someone is attacking us, however I posit that there's some people who have deep rooted disdain for automobiles. And maybe nails, they seem to be trying to blow up a lot of nails. If I was a builder, I'd be locking my shed and issuing a press statement declaring that the shed and general back yard area has been moved up to 'Orange Status'. Whatever that means. I think when they declare 'Orange Status', a fleet of snoopy old ladies with push basket thingys go out and start reporting meaningless things as illegal activity... perhaps prompting raids by, oh, I don't know.. Immigration?
Anyways, I can find this as funny as I like, the truth of the matter is it's pretty close to home. About 20 mins after I left Hammersmith tube station to go to work yesterday, a 'suspicious package' was reported at Hammersmith Station, then isolated, then exploded by the trusty bomb squad.
Turns out, the package had nothing in it. Except puppies. Man, was it messy. OK, so it wasn't full of puppies, but it does show how alert everyone is at the moment.
Mind you, life seems to go on as per usual. I do feel pretty safe and it's that packed on the tube when I catch it, I doubt anyone would be able to move enough to get their hand in their pocket to trigger any kind of device; I can't even get my iPod out of my jeans.
I guess, all I can say is fear not, I shall survive.
Also, Charlotte and I both have full-time work and as such will now be able to do more touristy things, like go to the Tower of London, which we did on Sunday.
Tower of London was awesome. It's so alien to stand in a building, or look at a fortress wall that has been there for 900 years.
All Australia had 900 years ago was bark canoes and some woomeras. Which is culturally rich in it's own right, but nowhere near as interesting (in my opinion) as murder, witch-hunts, deceit, wars and giant diamonds.
Oh yeah and Adam Hills was really funny the other weekend too. I'd recommend going to see him, or at least watching Spicks and Specks. And some trivia: He has a prosthetic leg. Not for fun, but for walking and possibly kicking purposes! Wow. I'm like the Guinness Book of Rubbish.
Charlotte says to mention I am getting a hair cut this weekend as i am beginning to alienate people as they can't see my face for my hair.
So yes, soon I will be more streamlined and less microphone-y.

PS: Thanks to everyone for the birthday wishes/presents. You rock. Like a chair that rocks.